Moved in together

I need you to know that living with my boyfriend goes against my moral fabric however with that said I did it. I moved my 17 year old daughter and I into my boyfriends 3 bedroom house. I have been struggling for a few months (before he came along) to pay my bills. In the end in order to try and help myself in saving money I moved in with the thoughts that if he doesn't change or if he never seems to want to marry me that I will move out. I will pay my bills, I will get myself organized. Right now I am sitting at Starbucks awaiting my friends arrival with the joy of being out by myself for awhile.  My boyfriend has been working a shift that in the beginning drove me crazy but then it began to make me happy. I didn't have to stress over his time away because I was sleeping, however as a teacher who is off for the next couple of weeks, him being home all day long has brought with it some stresses. I often feel suffocated just because he is quite needy, he loves me being by his side and I have to be very honest, I've been afraid of losing him to the point that I wouldn't go out without him.

In the last couple of days I have discovered that I'm not happy, some of it comes from my moral compass being out of whack, the rest comes from not sure if this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. There are moments I can't imagine ever being without him and then there are moments that I begin to doubt that this is really what I want. Unfortunately making decisions is really hard, I love him, I have brought my daughter here, I have changed so many things in my world and have lost things on top of that to be with him. I can't make a decision on a whim, I have to truly think and pray this through. (should have done both before moving in with him or taking him back).  At this point though I'm here, I have brought my life to a new place.  Here is where I need to take my life back, first things first. I need to trim my weight and my wallet keep my eyes on Christ even when it's hard because I know he's not happy with who I am right now. I need Him to give me the strength to move on to be able to make decisions that are hard, right now though I'm not ready to make decions but I'm at least willing to allow him a chance to love and be with me.